Current Favorites

Here are a few of favorite things..currently.

** The weather. Oh my goodness, it is like 68 degrees and there is a cool breeze every now and then. I am so blissfully content.

** The Head and The Heart. Haven't heard of them? Find them. Youtube, Spotify, Amazon, you could go ahead and just download their whole albums because it will be worth it. I had liked them for a while, their folksy, acoustic sound, oh but then I heard them at MAHA this summer here in Omaha. And they blew me away. Again. I can't stop. And I won't stop. (Thee only good thing to come out of Miley Cyrus). I'm hooked. And you should be too.

** Fresh vegetable juice. I can't even believe I am admitting this, but I bought a juicer because it was on sale and had a cool blender thing attached and so I just did it. So with that and my attempt to be healthier, I find myself juicing foods on the bring of spoiling so they don't go to waste. And when it turns up to be all veggies and garden goodness..it makes me happy. I am not ashamed of the delicious taste. I refuse.

** Crossfit. Okay, so before anyone rolls their eyes, bear with me. I have known and of Crossfit for years now as my sister owns a gym in Kansas. I knew I liked it and I knew I wanted to "do" it, I just never did. I talked and talked about doing it but meh, never happened. Well I took the plunge and I am so very glad I did. My friend Paul and I joke that one of the first rules of Crossfit is to, unlike Fight Club, always talk about Crossfit. This is true for some and even more so for others. I can't blame people because really, it all makes such valid sense and when you start, its hard to stop. Except when you re poor..then well its like wicked easy. So here I am tootin' the horn, I LOVE CROSSFIT! It hurts me to the point of tears and hatred but I just want it to love me, so I keep going back. Each and every painful step it takes.

** Football season. Tis the season of tailgating and screaming til my voice goes out. Thanks to my sister in law and being a Nebraska resident, I am now a recruited member of the sea of red. Once again, I regret nothing. I drank the Kool-Aid and I will not go back. GO BIG RED!

** People watching. I am tucked back in to my little nook at my favorite coffee shop in my favorite part of Omaha. See!

Isn't it pretty??!? #AromasBenson
The best type of people come in and out of the doors here. Especially when there is a show happening on the stage because even more random people show up. People truly are intriguing. The more I get to know myself, the more I realize just how insanely unique each individual is.

** All the incredible, beautiful, warm, unconditional loving, patient and glorious people in my life. You are who makes me who I am and influences me in even the smallest ways. Thank you for loving me when I make it so very difficult sometimes. You are my favorites. As the infamous Matt O'Mealey once told me, "Even Jesus had favorites." (This man is going to make a swell father.)

Happy Friday  my favorites! Cheers!

MAHA Music Festival

This weekend was full of firsts for me. Some of the guys in my small group from church took me to shoot trap Saturday morning. It was my first time ever shooting a gun. It was pretty sweet and I didn't do half bad! The machine was super sound sensitive so I had to fire quickly a couple times which led to this pretty bruise on my shoulder.

Quickly following my shooting lesson was rushing home to dress for my first music festival. Jake and Erin's birthday present to me was a ticket to MAHA Music Festival here in Omaha. It was one of the best days I have had in years. We went a full 12 hours from noon to midnight. It was rainy all week and even that morning but come time for the shows and the sun came out with full force! It was a hot one! 

A favorite was a local Omaha band called Mean Street. Great values, they have my respect. 

After multiple bands, the moment we were all waiting for... DOOMTREE!!! I mean they were not the only moment but the one we were super excited for. AND THEY DID NOT DISAPPOINT!! Oh my did we dance. It was incredible. Check out this video of their song Bangarang.(https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=E2dX_k6MvWM)  Its just...awesome. and the chick can raaaaaap! Super bad ass.

And The Local Natives killed it and then played Sun Hands and all the hearts were happy. 

Then there was The Head and The Heart

 I could go on for daaaays about how much I loved them. 

Then finally Death Cab for Cutie came on and reminded us all how great they were then and even so now. I was so exhausted by that time, I was ready for my bed and air conditioning but so worth every sweaty second. Thank you Jake and Erin for taking me but making memories with me that I will hold dear to my heart forever. MWHA!

Being A Better Lover

 Love. 

"noun-any object of warm affection or devotion." As defined by my dictionary app.

What a way to define something so diverse.... In today's society using the term "love" is quite common. We use it casually in our every day lives to explain how we feel about something or someone. The English language only has one word to describe an infinite amount of definitions for love. It could be why we as an American society lack in communication and tolerance. But let's be honest, politics are by FAR my forte. 

I have many loves in my life. I could easily take a big chunk of those infinite definitions just for me. Love is the most natural feeling I have ever had. Since I knew what feelings were, I "loved" this and "loved" that. I loved observing. I to this day, love to the ends of all spectrums and back again. It seeps out of my pores in every possible, tangible way. I love people in particular. As soon as I meet someone new, I can tell you at least a dozen traits I just "love" about them. For instance, a few current loves in my life. 

This furball truly is a gem. She's stubborn and lovely. Loyal as all canine go and just goes with the flow of my chaotic lifestyle. Bless her. 

Obligatory coffee shot. If you've met me and this surprises you, I didn't actually talk to you. 

These people. They make me better and don't bat an eye when I am hard to love. Especially when I'm the grumpy old troll who lives under their stairs. (Dora the Explorer anyone?) 

So comes all those on the receiving end of such an abundance of feelings. They were and are always very gracious. In a way, love was/is a crutch for me. A default. I could coast through life loving and no one would know any different. Recently, and by recent I'll say the last 6-8 months, I have realized what it is like to struggle to love someone. It was as if I was fighting my instincts. I could not put into words, or even rational thoughts, the weight and strain on my heart as I struggled with a relationship so dear to me. 

My church had a guest preacher last weekend from one of our church plants in England. So not only were we blessed with such wisdom and grace(I'm pretty sure I became a Christian all over again), we heard it all in a delightful, British accent! It's the little things. More importantly, he spoke of how to be better lovers and just how important and deep the love of Jesus goes. We as people need to be better lovers because we are loved by the One who gives it in the truest form of its definition. This caused me to really look at the love I so freely give in my life. The many levels of love I carry have yet to run dry, so why was there still so much weight on my heart when it came to this particular relationship? Through some late night discussions with some from my missional community, I was pushed to truly look at my heart and see not if I COULD love(because obviously that wasn't a problem) but HOW I was loving. And I was on autopilot. Give here, love there, respond to that person, forgive this one, and on and on I went. What a selfless lover I am, right? How easy we fall short to even our greatest blessings bestowed on us. I had fallen into habit and was falling short to the very person I had loved so dearly and was hurt by. Ah but with such a realization comes a load of pride. So. Much. Pride. And thank you to those who on that late night caused me to realize it. Truly. So as difficult as it was, I gave up that pride and took one step(a very small one) towards being a better lover to the person I was struggling so hard to love. It was so hard, people. 

Another humbling life lesson for the books and one more thing to add the list of daily battles to be fought.  For my fellow lovers out there, my sister sent me this quote that, phew! cut to the core but produced such encouragement. So please continue to mend not just others, but yourself with them. 

Cheers! 

. 

Lifers

So all morning I have been thinking about friends. I once heard about this girl who on her way to college told all her high school friends she planned on really jumping into the college life and trying to make new friends. At first when I heard this, my reaction was kind of put off. Really? You have to drop your old friends in order to make new ones? Yeah, okay.  Prick. 

As many of you know, I didn't attend college but went to a one year trade school to become a professional nanny. So when I think about that this girls logic,  I get it to a degree about branching out and blah blah, but how does that fit me?  I have heard on numerous occasions that you make your best friends in college. So again I asked myself, did I miss out on more than just the degree in not going to college? I have gone through moments over the years where I look and think, all my good friends are from high school.. Does that mean I am "living in the past?" Or "will I never get past the good old days because I haven't made new lifelong friends?" Now please understand, I have met some of thee most incredible people since high school that I cherish so very dearly. I am talking more about those lifelong friends who stay in your life through all seasons of good, bad and ugly. So today as I was thinking about my dear friends I saw this weekend when I went home, my mind really dug into who we are today and how far we ve come. And this is where I see a flaw in the girls logic of leaving her past behind. These women I went to high school with are not the same girls they were then. They have all grown and changed over the years and stand here today in the same skin(some of it stretched way out in the belly region! 😃) but not the same mind or soul. I looked at the picture taken below and I no longer see my teammates on the basketball team or classmates in pre calc. I see a group of women in the prime of their lives who are seasoned beings of society. A wife&mother, a teacher, a nurse, a vet student, a caregiver, a dialysis tech. Sticking with these girls and being with them as they grow and make mistakes has been one of the best parts of our friendships. I look at all the friends I have today from high school and just laugh. Some of them I have only become friends with in the last couple years. (It is amazing to me the relationship I have with people I barely spoke to in high school.) Others have known me for my very worst and somehow still talk to me today. What if I hadn't kept them in my life? What if I just let them fade? I don't think I would be the same person without each and every one of them. I believe God places people in your life for seasons and others are "lifers." I have been blessed with such an array of friend across my life living just down the road to all the way in Norway. This is my point, sometimes when you stick with something and maintain it, the results may just be one of life's greatest blessings. Put in the time. It is worth it. To all the people who have put up with all my shenanigans all these years and to those who just jumped on board and get to experience it, here is to you!! 

Memories

Whenever I pull up my blog to write a post, I am always amused to read my title "These Are A few of My Favorite Things." It reminds me to try and write of something positive instead of going on a rant. It reminds me to take a breath and evaluate before jumping in because the purpose is to write of my favorite things. So on this day, one of my favorite things are memories. Memories cover the full range of emotions of the human spectrum. Memories allow us to recall history and instill new traditions. Memories serve as lessons, reminders and encouragement. Sometimes even as inspiration or nostalgia. Memories are great. For some of us, memories are all we have left of loved ones who have passed away or lost in tragedy. Today in particular, I love memories for the latter reason. 11 years. Whoa. Last year at the decade mark, I was too busy to really even let it sink in that an entire decade, an amount of time referencing certain eras, had passed since my brother died. This year I honestly thought would just come and go. I would think back to that day so long ago when I had time and that d be it. Ha. Not so much. I used to think I could feel only two emotions, pain and indifference. If anyone has ever lost someone close to them and hasn't realized this yet,(it took me 10 years, so no worries!!) please hear me. There is more to it! You get to feel so much more. That's the glory of healing! Being in Omaha this past year has made me realize this. I automatically thought being here and driving by the hospital where we were told he was going to die was going to be painful. Remembering the nights spent in the Ronald McDonald House, not knowing what would happen next. Living just around the corner in the Old Market from his favorite restaurant. I just figured it'd all fit into the pain zone of my two part emotion scale. The memories would be painful and remind me he died. What surprised me was quite the opposite. I got new memories. Ones I had forgotten. Deja vu moments of driving in a certain area of Omaha and feeling the warm rush of "I have been here before.." And they all were with my brother. What I thought would bring me more pain ended up giving me more than I would have ever had if I had not ever come to Omaha. Memories are all I have of my big brother and after such a long time, they begin to fade. I have been blessed with new memories this past year and they have been beautiful. So what I found being in Omaha isn't that this is where we found out he was going to die, but how he has continued to live in my mind. Even after 11 years. Praise be to God for showing me such mercy. So any of you who have limited yourself to feel or not feel when it comes to memories, free yourself and maybe.. Just maybe you will be surprised. God works good through all things. Have a blessed Friday, my friends. Hug someone you love today. Call up someone you ve been in a fight with. Make sure those you love know it. Cheers! 

What are the chances of all my siblings, there happen to be a picture of Luke holding me as a baby? 

Freedom in commonality

So recently, I joined a mission community through the church I attend. It was a great decision. As I get to know these people and dig deeper into what makes them tick, I find the list of things in common growing. Clearly what brought us all together is the love of Jesus and common belief in Christianity. It is more than that though as you see the journey each of us have taken to reach that point. Truly intriguing. I amaze myself at how at ease I am naturally with these people and how encouraged I am in just sitting and having a cup of coffee. And I think the reason for it is this; freedom of commonality. When you find a group of people whether through religion or work or history or whoever your people are, you may begin to feel that same feeling of comfort. It's a safe zone. A place where you know truly being yourself won't be left alone, bruised and battered. It's a vulnerable place to be. I think many can feel uncomfortable in such a place because of the said vulnerability. If any of you are like me, sometimes words are hard to verbalize and when you do it ends up being this giant fluster cluck. And add being vulnerable on top of that?? Seems real comfortable right?? Not so much. My point is this. In those people we find common ground, we also find trust. In finding a spouse, it's the highest form of common trust. Mutual agreement and respect. Our biggest hurdle then is learning to let that vulnerability be the reason for trust. Trusting a group of people with your insecurities and shortcomings. If we can teach our younger society to find common ground and learn freedom in that, don't you think that maybe, just maybe fewer kids would feel the need for seclusion? It's those who feel no common ground that take the dark journey to suicide or shootings or crime. It is those who feel as if no one understands that begin to think of their situation irrationally. As Christians, we often isolate ourselves because we feel guilty or that no one struggles with the same sins as we do. Even if you aren't a Christian, isolation for struggles surround us all every day. Remember the vulnerability? Because of that, I believe we use isolation as a crutch because it's easier to be alone with our thoughts than to try and verbalize(with difficulty) our struggles. For Christmas, a couple in my missionional community (MC) gave us all a New Testament translation called The Voice. The book of James is one of my favorite books in the New Testament so naturally, I decide to read through that. Oh my. Check this out. "God the Father is the giver of all things and is looking for every opportunity to bless us. But many people have difficulty trusting and receiving good things, even when those things come from God. The problem is that we not only have trouble trusting God's work in our lives, but as also don't always respond to God's voice. People often hear the Scriptures but don't really listen. People store truths in their brains but never put them to use. For James, the only good religion is religion lived out every day." 😳💥 Did anyone else stand up and cheer?? How spot on was that!! I am not good with verbage like that! I read the above passage after completely half this blog and I just chuckled. God is around us, my friends. Take a minute to close your eyes, take a deep breath and listen. 

Taking the time

So as we get close to the holidays, family starts coming into town, all the finishing details of presents and baking are in full swing and we all seem a little stressed. So as we get stressed and busy, we sometimes just don't have time for the details of our life that are most important. I was reminded of this just a little bit ago after putting Z(the 4yr old I nanny for) to bed. My brother, Isaac, whom I haven't seen in quite some time, came into town yesterday afternoon. Naturally, we somehow stayed up til 2 in the morning talking and catching up last night. Which then led to numerous prayers of patience and energy for work today. So as today progressed I noticed more down time and cuddles with all three kids since I don't have the energy to be running around playing hockey or tag. It has been so nice. Z is always the last to lie down for his nap so I crawled into bed with him for a few minutes. I asked him about his show and tell at preschool and how his morning went. As it turns out he had got in a little trouble for not listening and told me he hurt his own feelings. It was darling but also made me realize if I hadn't been tired and taken those couple moments to rest and talk to him, he probably wouldn't have recalled the days happenings and I would have missed an opportunity to encourage him. Parents and other nannies can sympathize with precious moments like that. As I walked down the stairs, I wondered how many times I have missed moments because I didn't taken the time to really talk to Z. I have done that with my niece Lydia as well in the past. She always takes a little encouraging to open up. Kids in that 4-7 range are so tough because they are finally independent and able to do most everything on their own. However, we can get so caught up in their independence, we forget to give them the extra time and love they need. Kids are such amazing tiny humans and I take them for granted way more than I should. So take some extra time this year for a one on one moment with the tiny humans in your life. They are worth it. You might be surprised what you ll find out.